Sunday, November 18, 2012

Changing Self Perception is One of the Most Difficult Challenges

You go to the gym, you step on the scale and the number doesn't change. You try on your clothes and they are getting bigger. You step on the scale and the number doesn't change. You start to think why am I trying so hard and seeing no results...

I am sure we have all faced this wall. Our doctors and society have placed so much emphasis on a number. The BMI. You are a certain height so you should be a certain weight or you are labeled obese. So you get hung up on a number, a arbitrary definition of what "healthy" is.

I hit this wall about five weeks ago. I was in a hypertrophy routine, getting my muscles bigger. I was seeing lines where my muscles were bulging and I was happy. Until I stepped on the scale and saw that I had gained ten pounds. I had worked so hard, how could I have gotten fat? This was my folly. I equated weight gain to fat gain. I have been obese most of my life. I hit 180 lbs at the age of 12, at the time it was a blessing and saved my life. As I got older the extra weight became a burden. The I had difficulty breathing while tying my shoes type of burden.

So when I got down to 215 and then bulked up to 225, I felt like I was backsliding. Everything else was telling me differently, I had to donate a pair of my pants because they were too big for me. I bought some thermals and the first was an XL, which was too big so I bought a large and I was shocked at how good it looked on me. But the scale, that piece of machinery that reported how "healthy" I was kept nagging at me. Betraying my training by giving me the perception that I was fat.

My turning point hit when I was watching a video on YouTube. I seriously suggest anyone who is having issues with this to watch StrengthCamp's video on this topic. In the video Elliott Hulse talks about change, how you have to make a decision in what you want to see. Do you want to be tiny and lean? Do you want to be bigger and a bodybuilder? What you want to be is up to you.

At this point I decided that the scale was no longer my enemy, instead I turned it on itself. I am currently in a hybrid strength/hypertrophy session. I am at week 6 of my training and I gain weight, I also lose weight but that is not what I judge my progress by. I step on the scale and will sometimes be frustrated, but not because I gained weight. The opposite effect has happened, I get frustrated because I haven't gained as much weight as I wanted. I have a new perception of what I am trying to do.

In 6 weeks my hybrid session will be over. (I took a picture at my second week so I can see my progress. I guess I will see if I will post the picture from week 12 along side week 2. Along with a start and end weight of what I put up on which exercises.) I will then be moving into a 12 week strength and cut mode and my number will drop on the scale, but that will no longer define my health. My health is completely defined on how I feel, how my clothes are fitting, how much weight I put up and the progression I make.

Don't let the scale define who you are. Don't let it become a roadblock to your goals.

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